


let's get this bread

by renjeon



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Gyuhao, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Soonhoon - Freeform, Texting, Underage Drinking, YOLO, chat fic, i've planned this out with minimal effort and it will be a mess, lots of sex jokes .. like an exceeding amount of sex jokes.
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 20:15:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 14,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16070498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renjeon/pseuds/renjeon
Summary: soon: i text to cope with my crushing anxiety1004: That’s unhealthysoon: maybe so





	1. :-)

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first chatfic so please don't beat my ass. this was originally gyuhao but soonhoon is quickly taking the lead so the main ship is pretty ambiguous. other pairings (wonshua, verkwan, jeongcheol, whoever seokmin ends up with lol) are side pairings. let's get this bread.
> 
> \- eommaya

**big boys (+ chan)  
Monday, 7:01 a.m.**

**soon** : good morning kings

 **soon** : today we stop identifying as lgbt

 **soon** : and start identifying as lgtb

 **lil woozi vert** : huh

 **soon** : Let’s Get This Bread

 **lil woozi vert** _has left the chat_.

**soon** _added_ **lil woozi vert** _to the chat_. 

**soon** : ~:) 

**lil woozi vert** : annihilate me 

**seok** : good morning!!!! 

**soon** : oh the love of my life? 

**seok** : LMAO 

**boo** : i had a dream last night that a bunch of angry marshmallows were chasing me 

**vernonie** : What 

**kingyu** : what 

**lil woozi vert** : huh 

**boo** : they were singing 

**soon** : HUH 

**1004** : My Babies~~~ 

**1004** : Who’s excited for school!!!! 

**boo** : :( 

**seok** : :( 

**soon** : ~:( 

**1004** : You aren't freshmen anymore why are you sad 

**seok** : school is homophobic 

**1004** : Well no 

**wormwoo** : pull up on you wacks 

**boo** : STOP 

**chan hyung** : :((((( 

**1004** : MY NUMBER ONE BABY ARE YOU EXCITED FOR YOUR FRESHMAN YEAR 

**chan hyung** : no :((((((((( 

**soon** : if chan doesn’t like school then there is no school 

**soon** : school is cancelled until further notice 

**jo$hua** : It’ll be fine :-) 

**soon** : ew the nose 

**seok** : ew 

**chan hyung** : :-( 

**jo$hua** : )-: 

**scoops** : Stop texting and get ready for school. 

**kingyu** : he snapped 

**1004** : Oh Daddy! 

**kingyu** : i just vomited in my mouth 

**boo** : cheol ur literally a senior u don’t get to tell us what to do 

**scoops** : ??????? 

**scoops** : Yes I do 

**scoops** : That’s literally what being your senior means 

**boo** : I MEANT 

**boo** : u already did school like three times so u don’t have anything to worry about 

**boo** : whereas we have every right to be frightened. 

**boo** : so let us text. 

**vernonie** : No correlation found 

**boo** : frick u 

**soon** : he's right 

**soon** : i text to cope with my crushing anxiety 

**1004** : That’s unhealthy 

**soon** : maybe so 

**seok** : soonyoung hurry up n get ready so we can walk together ! 

**soon** : HSKHSKS! BYE KINGS ! 

**lil woozi vert** : ? 

**chan hyung** : i love romance 

**lil woozi vert** : they aren't dating 

**chan hyung** : right. 

**1004** : Go on my children 

**1004** : or I’ll give you kisses when I see you in the hallway 

**chan hyung** : ew bye 

**lil woozi vert** : bye 

**wormwoo** : bye 

**jo$hua** : Bye 

**scoops** : I'll stay ! 

**1004** : Bye 

********

**big boys (+ chan)  
10:16 a.m.**

**moonjun** : HHHJFHFJDKJ

 **moonjun** : I JSUT WOKE UP

 **moonjun** : MY FIRST CLASS STARTED 15 MINUTES AGI

 **moonjun** : HLE P MWE

 **soon** : good morning king

 **soon** : today we stop identifying as lgbt

 **lil woozi vert** _has left the chat_.

 **soon** : and start identifying as lgtb

 **soon** _added_ **lil woozi vert** _to the chat_.

 **soon** : LET’S GET THIS BREAD

**lil woozi vert** _has left the chat._


	2. rumors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kingyu: THE RUMORS ARE TRUE IM GAY
> 
> lil woozi vert: it’s not a rumor if we all know
> 
> seok: you literally came out three years ago

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FOR ANYONE WHO IS CONFUSED:  
> jeonghan seungcheol and jisoo are seniors  
> wonwoo junhui soonyoung minghao and woozi are juniors  
> seokmin mingyu seungkwan and vernon are sophomores  
> and chan is a freshman!
> 
> -eommaya

**big boys (+ chan)  
11:02 a.m.**

**kingyu** : guys i just saw the m

 **seok** : ?

 **vernonie** : Mingyu?

 **boo** : he die?

 **lil woozi vert** : he dropped his phone

 **boo** : how do u know

 **lil woozi vert** : we’re in chinese together rn

 **lil woozi vert** : it made the loudest sound and now everyone is looking at him

 **kingyu** : OST BEAUTIFUL MAN

 **vernonie** : ?????

 **kingyu** : THE RUMORS ARE TRUE IM GAY

 **lil woozi vert** : it’s not a rumor if we all know

 **seok** : you literally came out three years ago

 **kingyu** : I DROPPED MY PHONE AND HE LOOKED AT ME

 **kingyu** : WHAT ARE WE !

 **seok** : omg

 **lil woozi vert** : everyone looked

 **kingyu** : HE!!!!

 **soon** : is it loving men hours again mingyu

 **kingyu** : YA!!!!!!!!!

 **soon** : what’s new

 **boo** : what’s new

 **lil woozi vert** : what’s new

 **wormwoo** : Who is the Man

 **wormwoo** : the suspense is killing me

 **lil woozi vert** : there’s only like 10 students in this class and they’re mostly girls

 **kingyu** : NOT A STUDENT

 **lil woozi vert** : oh my god

 **soon** : Oh My God ?

 **soon** : please tell me it’s not your professor

 **soon** : you may be stupid but

 **soon** : you aren’t even that stupid

 **soon** : i mean maybe

 **kingyu** : NO

 **lil woozi vert** : it’s the prof’s aid

 **seok** : professors can have those??

 **soon** : professors can do anything they want

 **kingyu** : god he’s so fucking FINE!

 **soon** : ew im homophobic

 **seok** : i thought what we had was real ..

 **soon** : ur the exception baby!

 **lil woozi vert** _removed_ **soon** _from the chat._

 **seok** : HFHFN. JIHOON

 **lil woozi vert** : anyways

 **lil woozi vert** : just talk to him when class ends

 **kingyu** : and i thought i was the stupid one,

 **seok** _added_ **soon** _to the chat._

 **soon** : you can’t defeat me mortal

 **kingyu** : i can’t just talk to him

 **kingyu** : that’s scary.

 **soon** : the moon in pisces jumped out just then

 **kingyu** : im not even gonna pretend to know what that means

 **lil woozi vert** : what’s the worst thing that could happen

 **kingyu** : i could die

 **lil woozi vert** : well no

 **soon** : clearly jihoon hasn’t had a crush before

 **lil woozi vert** : you’re literally wrong but okay?

 **soon** : talking to ur crush is scary Vro

 **kingyu** : ya :(

 **wormwoo** : do you know his name

 **kingyu** : he was introduced at the beginning of class but i don’t remember

 **wormwoo** : well that’s useful

 **kingyu** : :(

 **soon** _changed the group name to **get mingyu a boyfriend challenge**_.

 **soon** : esketit

 **lil woozi vert** : don’t ever say that again

 **soon** : yes daddy ..

 **seok** : OMG

 **lil woozi vert** : do you ever shut the fuck up

 **soon** : only when u tell me to!

 **lil woozi vert** _removed_ **soon** _from the chat._

 **lil woozi vert** : if any of you add him back i will Kill you

 **kingyu** : this is no time for a lovers' quarrel 

**lil woozi vert** : a what.

 **kingyu** : im having a crisis

 **wormwoo** : first of all that was an awkward way to word that sentence

 **wormwoo** : second of all just find an excuse to talk to him?

 **wormwoo** : u are making this a bigger problem then it has to be

 **seok** _added_ **soon** _to the chat_.

 **soon** : surprise bitch

 **soon** : bet you thought you'd seen the last of me

 **kingyu** : ??? how would i do that

 **wormwoo** : that's for u to figure out bro

 **kingyu** : did u just call me bro...

 **kingyu** : ur fist was in my ass once...

 **wormwoo** : why would you bring that up?

 **wormwoo** : what are you gaining?

 **lil woozi vert** : i really could've gone my whole life not knowing that

 **kingyu** : what do u think we did the entire 2 years we dated

 **soon** : did puzzles

 **seok** : guess they did each other instead! 

**lil woozi vert** : if there's a god out there end my suffering im Begging you

 **soon** _removed_ **lil woozi vert** _from the chat._

 **soon** _changed their name to_ **god**.

 **scoops** _added_ **lil woozi vert** _to the chat._

 **scoops** : Who taught you all to text during class

 **boo** : who taught u to be a bitter old man

 **scoops** : Yowch

 **jo$hua** : Get mingyu a boyfriend challenge ?

 **god** : he can read !

 **wormwoo** : leave him alone before i beat you

 **jo$hua** : My uwus…

 **boo** : MY UWUSBDJ

 **1004** : Are we meeting for lunch kids!!!!

 **god** : sure lets get mcdonalds

 **lil woozi vert** : no

 **god** : why are you afraid of happiness

 **chan hyung** : i have a 12:00 class

 **chan hyung** : it ends at 12:50

 **seok** : same here

 **1004** : The world is so cruel

 **scoops** : You can eat with me !

 **1004** : You have to find me first ugly bitch

 **chan hyung** : i love romance

 **moonjun** : i skipped two classes.

 **1004** : Jun.

 **moonjun** : well.

 **1004** : I can’t believe we all can’t eat lunch together

 **1004** : This family is tearing at the seams

 **chan hyung** : god ur so dramatic

 **god** : the libra jumped out

 **1004** : And what about it

 **moonjun** : im free for lunch now

 **1004** : Because you skipped or because you actually have this time off

 **moonjun** : yes

 **boo** : i have a 12-12:50 class too

 **god** : FUCK!!!!!!!

 **seok** : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **boo** : guess it’s just me and seokmin for lunch

 **god** : MY LIFE IS OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **1004** : The gemini ..

 **god** : FCUK U

 **lil woozi vert** : im good for lunch rn

 **wormwoo** : u guys took too long

 **wormwoo** : jisoo and i are on our way to chick fil a

 **seok** : chick fil a is homophobic

 **wormwoo** : same

 **kingyu** : don’t make me say it again

 **wormwoo** : it was Two Years Ago and i regret Every Second

 **kingyu** : that’s not how i remember it

 **wormwoo** : have i told anyone how much i love jisoo

 **wormwoo** : love him so much !

 **god** : fisting mingyu's asshole doesn’t sound very homophobic to me

 **wormwoo** : who allowed soonyoung back into the chat

 **seok** : i abstain your honor

 **vernonie** : I also have a 12 oclock class

 **boo** : my baby!

 **vernonie** : :-)

 **lil woozi vert** : god u know what to do

 **god** : nah i like to watch u suffer

 **lil woozi vert** : fuck me

 **god** : was that an exclamation or a plea

 **lil woozi vert** : don’t make me leave this chat again

 **kingyu** : im glad everyone’s being all romantic but where’s my boyfriend

 **chan hyung** : u won’t have a boyfriend if u don’t talk to him

 **chan hyung** : pussy

 **1004** : CHAN

 **boo** : LMAOOOOO

 **chan hyung** : AM I WRONG

 **boo** : NO!

 **god** : MY KING

 **kingyu** : this is homophobic

 **chan hyung** : im bi but go off

 **lil woozi vert** : soonyoung and i weren’t being romantic but go off

 **kingyu** : that was .. a bit delayed jihoon

 **lil woozi vert** : i just had to make sure it was known.

 **kingyu** : oh

 **chan hyung** : oh

 **god** : oh

 **seok** : oh...

 **lil woozi vert** : ok weirdos...

 **1004** : Anyways……

 **1004** : Whoever isn’t going out meet in the cafe

 **1004** : I saved lots of seats !

 **kingyu** : i’ll b there in a bit

 **god** : see u soon kings


	3. gay face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> boo: vernon has a gay smile
> 
> vernonie: I think we ALL have gay smiles ..

Junhui squinted at the boy across the cafeteria, chin propped up on his fist. “He’s definitely Chinese,” he supplied over the sound of Mingyu’s dramatic groaning.

“Stop _staring_ at him!” Mingyu whined, covering his face with both hands. Jeonghan tilted his head past Junhui’s to get a better look, letting out a low whistle.

“He’s hot,” Jeonghan stated, earning a “heeeey” from Seungcheol and another groan from Mingyu. “What?” he asked innocently, nudging Seungcheol with his shoulder and grinning. “I’m just window shopping.”

Soonyoung slunk an arm over Mingyu’s slumped shoulders, using his other hand to shovel a spoonful of chocolate pudding into his mouth. “I don’t know what you’re so scared of,” he mumbled over the mouthful, prodding Mingyu in the shoulder with his (now wet) spoon (“Disgusting,” Jihoon muttered). “Look at the smile he just gave us. He seems approachable.”

Mingyu jolted under Soonyoung’s arm, head shooting up and eyes going wide. “He smiled at us?” He gave Junhui, who was now waving in the boy’s direction, an incredulous look.

“And now he’s walking over,” Junhui chirped, causing Mingyu to bury his face back in his hands.

“I’m gonna end it,” he mumbled into his palms.

“Do it, pussy,” came Wonwoo’s voice from the other side of the table, earning a giggle from Joshua and a glare from Mingyu. At the same moment, Mingyu detected the new presence of a person on his left. Slowly, he turned his head and looked up. There was the man of his dreams in the flesh, all tan skin and wiry limbs and bright smiles. His black hair looked soft to the touch, and Mingyu wanted nothing more than to run his fingers through it. Maybe pull it. Just a little.

The table fell silent as Junhui started speaking in airy Mandarin, sounding almost hesitant. The boy paused, then immediately spoke back in the same language, and Junhui’s face broke out in a grin.

“What the hell,” Jeonghan whispered. The whole table watched in awe as Junhui and the love of Mingyu’s life trilled away in a language none of them understood. 

“Imagine just,” Soonyoung started, scraping at the plastic of his near-empty pudding cup, “speaking to someone in a foreign language. Like, just assuming they speak it, and then speaking it. What a weird concept.”

“I feel like you enjoy hearing yourself talk,” Jihoon quipped, digging his fork into his tteokbokki, “and that’s why you always say some dumb shit.”

Mingyu, suddenly registering the boy’s eyes flitting in his direction, was petrified in his seat, staring helplessly at the boy looming over him. For a moment, the boy’s voice dropped as he mumbled something that made Junhui cover his mouth and let out a high-pitched laugh. At that, the boy dipped his head a little, bumped his fist against Junhui’s, and left with his hands buried in the pockets of his jeans. Mingyu pinched the bridge of his nose, irritation burning his cheeks as he watched him leave. “I can’t believe you, Jun.”

Jun grinned a little, zipping up his lunch box. “I guess you don’t want to learn about your man, then?”

Mingyu snapped his head in Jun's direction fast enough to give him whiplash. “I can believe you. I believe you so much.”

With an eye roll, Junhui leaned forward onto his elbows, cupping his own face with his hands and drumming the tips of his fingers against his cheeks. “His name is Xu Minghao. He’s a junior majoring in dance.”

Mingyu sighed dreamily. “Xu Minghao.”

Jun ignored him and moved to stuff his empty lunch box into his bag. “His dad is the Chinese teacher. He has a gap between 11:00 and 1:00 on Mondays and Wednesdays, so he helps his dad grade papers and stuff.”

“Why did you ask him all of this stuff?” Jihoon mumbled, prying his fork away from where Soonyoung was trying to take a bite of his food. 

“God knows Mingyu wasn’t going to.” Jun smirked as Mingyu let out a groan, scooting his tray in front of Soonyoung so he could drop his head onto the table.

“He’s so cute,” he whimpered, lifting his head for a moment to squint at Junhui. “You didn’t mention me, right?”

Jun shrugged, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “I just said you recognized him from your Chinese class,” he replied, moving to stand up. “That’s it.”

Mingyu returned his forehead to the table, letting out a loud sigh. “I want to have his children,” he mumbled.

“We’re drawing a line, Mingyu,” spoke Soonyoung, who rubbed a faux-reassuring hand on the back of Mingyu’s neck. “You can’t just say things like that in public. Keep it behind closed doors.”

**get mingyu a boyfriend challenge  
12:37 p.m.**

**moonjun** _changed_ **kingyu** _’s name to_ **minghao’s bitch.**

 **1004** : Nice

 **minghao’s bitch** : i ain’t even mad

 **chan hyung** : did mingyu finally speak to him

 **minghao’s bitch** : no

 **wormwoo** : no

 **lil woozi vert** : no

 **god** : no

 **god** : he just cried the whole time

 **minghao’s bitch** : I DIDN’T

 **scoops** : Junhui talked to him for a while.

 **god** : will junhui date minghao instead? a scandal?

 **moonjun** : hmmmmmm...

 **minghao’s bitch** : Please God No

 **jo$hua** : We don’t even know if he’s gay or not

 **1004** : He had a gay smile

 **jo$hua** : A what

 **1004** : A gay smile?

 **lil woozi vert** : that’s a thing ?

 **1004** : Ya. You have the biggest one

 **lil woozi vert** : fuck you

 **boo** : vernon has a gay smile

 **vernonie** : I think we ALL have gay smiles ..

 **1004** : He’s right your honor

 **seok** : vernon is straight passing but he has the gayest face out of all of us

 **vernonie** : :~)

 **1004** : Gay Face Awards go to

 **1004** : Vernon Wonwoo Me Seungkwan Jihoon Junhui Soonyoung

 **scoops** : Y’all are weird.

 **scoops** : You can’t tell someone’s sexuality by the way their face looks

 **1004** : You’re just mad because you have a straight face

 **scoops** : -_-

 **god** : gay face

 **god** : is that a new psy song?

 **seok** : bro

 **boo** : LOL

 **minghao’s bitch** : is my face gay enough

 **1004** : It’s not

 **seok** : definitely not

 **minghao’s bitch** : uh oh

 **minghao’s bitch** : how do i fix this

 **god** : u already dress like a lesbian so i think ur safe

 **1004** : Why would you say something so controversial yet so brave

 **moonjun** : that was very galaxy brain of u soonyoung

 **minghao’s bitch** : this is discrimination and profiling against my lesbian family

 **minghao’s bitch** : how would u know what lesbians dress like

 **god** : butch lesbians and gay bottoms dress the same

 **god** : and i look at jihoon every day so i have a pretty good idea

 **seok** : THAT WAS FUCKED UP

 **boo** : HBABHHSNNN

 **lil woozi vert** : we play by street rules now

 **lil woozi vert** : i have no choice but to be bout that action and it's your fault

 **god** : IT WASN'T AN INSULT

 **lil woozi vert** : being a bottom is an insult.

 **boo** : 1. you literally confirmed you were a bottom Yourself

 **boo** : 2. you just invalidated half of this chat

 **moonjun** : i demand an apology !

 **lil woozi vert** : no

 **moonjun** : >:(

 **lil woozi vert** : i Never said i was a bottom

 **lil woozi vert** : i simply said i would give shawn sunbaenim the ride of his life

 **seok** : SUNBAENIMMMSJ

 **god** : as someone who likes bottoms i would Never use it as an insult

 **chan hyung** : i can't believe i had to read this with my own eyes

 **chan hyung** : i could've lived a long and prosperous life not knowing your sexual preferences

 **god** : chan have you had the birds and the bees talk yet

 **chan hyung** : im literally an adult

 **god** : hmm...

 **vernonie** : Hmmmm...

 **1004** : Hmmmmmm....

 **chan hyung** : I Go To College With You

 **god** : then how come i never see you...

 **moonjun** : hmmmmm...

 **chan hyung** : it's a big college. stop

 **boo** : is chan actually a high schooler...

 **chan hyung** : we're eating lunch together literally right this second

 **chan hyung** : i have never disliked so many people at once

 **minghao’s bitch** : are u mad because u haven't hit puberty yet

 **chan hyung** : are u mad because u still haven't grown a personality yet

 **minghao’s bitch** : grow tall urself and i'll think about it.

 **lil woozi vert** : i know that wasn't directed at me

 **lil woozi vert** : but it still hurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u hated this chapter let me know so i can never do it again


	4. he's a dancer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> minghao’s bitch: WHAT ARE U SAYING TO HIM
> 
> moonjun: i said u want his dick in ur ass
> 
> minghao’s bitch: NOOOOOSNSJ

**get mingyu a boyfriend challenge  
1:04 p.m.**

**chan hyung** : guys

 **chan hyung** : guess who’s in my dance class

 **moonjun** : me

 **god** : and me

 **moonjun** : and minghao

 **minghao’s bitch** : WHAT

 **god** : he’s a dancer

 **minghao’s bitch** : THAT’S SO SEXY

 **seok** : mingyu’s smiling at his phone like a dumbass in the middle of class

 **minghao’s bitch** : IM IN LOVE WITH HIM

 **lil woozi vert** : you can’t be in love with someone you haven’t spoken to

 **god** : again, jihoon seems to have not experienced a crush

 **lil woozi vert** : you literally don’t know anything about me

 **seok** : it seems jihoon is touchy about the crush subject...

 **god** _changed the group name to **get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge.**_

 **minghao’s bitch** : just found out the world doesn’t revolve around me. shocked and upset

 **lil woozi vert** : very bold of you to assume im gay

 **1004** : That was a joke right

 **boo** : just last week u said if shawn mendes wasn’t a bottom u would “ride that dick like a carousel”

 **seok** : oh mood

 **lil woozi vert** : sleep w one eye open tonight seungkwan

 **boo** : oh no im so scared .. all 3 foot 4 inches of u ..

 **boo** : please spare me ..

 **lil woozi vert** : someone hold me back

 **god** : now that i think about it

 **god** : in the 10 years ive known jihoon i don’t think he’s ever had a crush that i know of

 **lil woozi vert** : we all know im gay and i stand by what i said

 **lil woozi vert** : now let’s keep talking about minghao please

 **chan hyung** : he and junhui keep whispering to each other in chinese

 **minghao’s bitch** : jun’s really tryna come up on my man huh

 **chan hyung** : fight

 **boo** : fight fight fight

 **seok** : mingyu’s pouting

 **moonjun** : im just trying to be a good wingman and i get accused of homewrecking

 **moonjun** : this is why i don’t go to my classes

 **god** : i think that logic is flawed

 **lil woozi vert** : you are in NO place to be talking about logic

 **wormwoo** : you have an iq of 1.7

 **god** : im an intellectual i stan shinee

 **minghao’s bitch** : JUN WHAT ARE U SAYING TO HIM

 **moonjun** : i said u want his dick in ur ass

 **minghao’s bitch** : NOOOOOSNSJ

 **moonjun** : im kidding.

 **moonjun** : first of all i don’t know if he speaks english or not

 **moonjun** : he just moved here two years ago to attend college and he’s only spoken in mandarin so far

 **moonjun** : second of all i keep trying to ask questions to get gay answers but he is not complying

 **moonjun** : i did however learn he isn’t seeing anyone

 **minghao’s bitch** : im on the come up boys

 **seok** : he could still be a hetero

 **minghao’s bitch** : ask him if he likes dick in chinese

 **moonjun** : nah im leaving that one up to u

 **minghao’s bitch** : frick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **chan hyung** : Attached: 1 Video

 **chan hyung** : soonyoung is the best dancer!!!

 **god** : WHY did u film that

 **god** : i choreographed it weeks ago so it was rusty :(

 **chan hyung** : i thought someone might want to see it ! :)

 **seok** : LOL

 **god** : who on earth would want to see that

 **1004** : I would! That’s my son !

 **chan hyung** : Attached: 1 Video

 **chan hyung** : that one’s for u mingyu

 **minghao’s bitch** : HHHFJFHH

 **moonjun** : he’s good right

 **minghao’s bitch** : ALEXA CUT MY DICK OFF

 **god** : seokmin report

 **seok** : he’s literally crying

 **seok** : like there are tears

 **seok** : he had to excuse himself from class

 **god** : NOT AT SCHOOL MINGYU

 **god** : HAVE SOME DECENCY

 **minghao’s bitch** : I JSU T NEED A TSISUE

 **minghao’s bitch** : I CANDT BREATHE

 **chan hyung** : Attached: 1 Video

 **chan hyung** : and junhui !

 **minghao’s bitch** : NO ONE CARES ABOUT JUN

 **moonjun** : fuck you

 **wormwoo** : folks...

 **wormwoo** : jihoon just threw his phone in the trash can on his way out of the classroom...

 **god** : HE WHAT

 **seok** : LMAOOOOO

 **god** : WHY

 **chan hyung** : why did no one teach him how to face his feelings

 **1004** : He is so chaotic

 **wormwoo** : should i get his phone for him

 **seok** : nah he’ll come back to get it

 **wormwoo** : his face was really red

 **wormwoo** : oh he’s back

 **wormwoo** : folks he did not get his phone

 **god** : is he ok???

 **boo** : i can’t believe him

 **boo** : he’s more of a mess than vernon was before he asked me out

 **vernonie** : I thought I was straight

 **vernonie** : It was a very hard time for me

 **scoops** : The hell is going on here this day

 **chan hyung** : jihoon is gay

 **minghao’s bitch** : im gay

 **god** : jun is SEXY!!!!

 **moonjun** : thanks

 **jo$hua** : I’m gay too !

 **wormwoo** : god ur so cute

 **jo$hua** : :-D

 **seok** : mingyu where did u go

 **seok** : please come back i don't need u stealing my psych lecture notes again

 **minghao’s bitch** : don't mind me im just watching this video of minghao dancing until my eyes burn out of my skull

 **chan hyung** : ur welcome

 **minghao’s bitch** : i owe u my life

 **wormwoo** : class was dismissed

 **wormwoo** : jihoon is getting his phone now

 **god** : jihoonie~~

 **lil woozi vert** _removed_ **chan hyung** _from the chat_.

 **lil woozi vert** _has left the chat_.

**get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge  
Tuesday, 2:17 a.m.**

**boo** : y’all ever think about how cute vernon is and start crying

 **wormwoo** : can’t say i’ve experienced that no

 **scoops** : Why are you awake

 **boo** : why are You awake

 **scoops** : Hm. Perhaps you’ve made a point

 **1004** : Why are you talking like me

 **scoops** : Why are you texting me if I’m right next to you

 **1004** : Oh so you want me to beat your ass in person?

 **scoops** : Would it be bad if I said yes

 **seok** : seungcheol the bottom confirmed

 **1004** : Absolutely not

 **1004** : Also you’re awake too?

 **seok** : soonyoung’s snoring woke me up

 **boo** : same with vernon

 **boo** : n he’s still cute :((((

 **1004** : Wonwoo?

 **wormwoo** : u think i sleep?

 **1004** : Valid response

 **minghao’s bitch** : i just remembered i don’t see minghao until wednesday and now i wanna set myself on fire

 **boo** : that’s literally tomorrow

 **minghao’s bitch** : tomorrow is not soon enough

 **seok** : i hate romance

 **seok** : this is why i don't want to date anyone ever

 **boo** : you can date chan

 **seok** : …

 **seok** : goodnight

 **boo** : was that a no

**get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge  
Tuesday, 7:00 a.m.**

**god** : good morning kings

 **god** : today we Baby Negae banhae beorin naegae wae irae Dureopdago mulleoseoji malgo Geunyang naegae matgyeobwala eoddae My lady [Key] Ring ding dong Ring ding dong Ring diggi ding diggi[...]

 **lil woozi vert** : will you shut your mouth

 **lil woozi vert** : and why is my screen name still like this

 **lil woozi vert** : it's not even funny anymore

 **god** _changed_ **lil woozi vert** _’s name to_ **woozaddy**.

 **woozaddy** : every day is a struggle with you

 **woozaddy** _changed their name to_ **jihoon**.

 **god** : :(

 **minghao’s bitch** : GUYS

 **minghao’s bitch** : I JUST SAW MINGHAO AT THE GYM

 **god** : how was it

 **minghao’s bitch** : IM STILL GAY

 **boo** : did u go in

 **seok** : no he didn’t

 **minghao’s bitch** : i

 **seok** : i saw u standing outside like a pussy when i was walking to the laundry room

 **minghao’s bitch** : he looked so good i didn’t want to interrupt him

 **minghao’s bitch** : or his sexy leg workout !

 **vernonie** : So you … .. ……. .. . … watched him

 **minghao’s bitch** : ya

 **moonjun** : i woke up on time! who’s gonna praise me!

 **god** : we don’t exist to satisfy your praise kink

 **moonjun** : frick you!

 **seok** : im proud of u

 **moonjun** : i’ll suck ur dick!

 **seok** : NOPE

 **god** : seokmin are u cheating on me...

 **seok** : don’t even start today

 **jihoon** : i agree

 **chan hyung** : what would life be if not waking up at 7 am to jihoon being obvious

 **jihoon** : i’ll seriously beat your ass

 **seok** : im a victim

 **jihoon** : yeah you will be

 **god** : i really feel like im missing out on something

 **jihoon** : you aren’t missing out on anything

 **chan hyung** : yeah you’re just dumb

 **jihoon** : shut Up

 **1004** : My Babies!

 **1004** : Who’s ready for their second day of school!!!!

 **boo** : :(

 **1004** : No

 **seok** : :(

 **1004** : No

 **god** : :)

 **1004** : :D

 **seok** : please say sike

 **chan hyung** : isn’t it great that soonyoung has such a short attention span

 **jihoon** _removed_ **chan hyung** _from the chat_.

 **god** : huh

 **jihoon** : mind ur own business

 **jo$hua** : Good morning !

 **jo$hua** : I have my first class with Wonwoo !

 **wormwoo** : i want to kiss you Literally all the time

 **boo** : wonwoo not being an empty abyss of emotional absence is the gag of the century

 **god** : he’s literally a cancer why would he be

 **wormwoo** : did you just call me cancer

 **god** : do any of you read your birth charts

 **god** : any of you at all

 **seok** _added_ **chan hyung** _to the chat_.

 **chan hyung** : why are you booing me im right

 **scoops** : For three years this chat has just been Jihoon removing people.

 **jihoon** : ur next grandpa

 **scoops** : D:

 **wormwoo** : it’s a coping mechanism

 **jihoon** : you all just really test my patience

 **god** : i’ve been removed the most

 **god** : does that mean i test your patience the most

 **jihoon** : honestly

 **jihoon** : yeah

 **god** : mission accomplished

 **minghao’s bitch** : i zoned out and noticed minghao leaving so i started to leave too and he bumped into me

 **minghao’s bitch** : he said “sorry”

 **minghao’s bitch** : the wedding is tomorrow

 **moonjun** : in english ?

 **moonjun** : daebak.

 **boo** : DAEBAKDNNN

 **seok** : WHY DO YOU KNOW KOREAN

 **moonjun** : hello?

 **moonjun** : if song joong ki is korean then so am i

 **1004** : Well no

 **moonjun** : aniyo?

 **god** : jihoon

 **jihoon** _removed_ **moonjun** _from the chat_.

 **god** : thank you

 **jihoon** : there's no room for koreaboos here


	5. a gift

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> seok: aw i like him
> 
> JUST MINGYU: SAME
> 
> JUST MINGYU: i mean
> 
> JUST MINGYU: beep beep boop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i tried my best to get accurate mandarin but i don't speak chinese so feel free to correct me if it's wrong!

**get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge  
Thursday, 1:52 p.m.**

**moonjun** : mingyuuuuu

 **moonjun** : i have a gift for u!

 **minghao’s bitch** : ?

 **moonjun** _added_ **haohao** _to the chat_.

 **boo** : MINGYU NEEDS TO CHANGE IS SCREEN NAME

 **minghao’s bitch** : HOLY SHIT

 **moonjun** : FUCK I FORGOT

 **god** : AAAHSBJDJ

 **boo** : AAAAAAHJSJB

 **minghao’s bitch** : REMOVE HIMFM

 **moonjun** : HOW DO I DO THATDF

 **boo** : OGH MY GOD

 **god** _removed_ **haohao** _from the chat_.

 **minghao’s bitch** : MAYBE HE DIDN’T SEE

 **jihoon** : LMAO

 **god** : JUNHUI

 **moonjun** : HHHHDHJFJJ

 **minghao’s bitch** _changed their name to_ **JUST MINGYU**.

 **JUST MINGYU** : MY HEART IS IN MY ASS

 **moonjun** _added_ **haohao** _to the chat_.

 **moonjun** : hi!!!!!!!!!

 **haohao** : Jun ?

 **god** : is this a fever dream

 **haohao** : 这里发生什么事了?

 **moonjun** : 你说英文吗?

 **haohao** : -____________-

 **moonjun** : 不可以?

 **haohao** : 不要.

 **moonjun** : WHY ARE YOU SO DIFFICULT

 **haohao** : WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME

 **seok** : LMAO

 **haohao** : Hello everyone

 **haohao** : My name is Minghao and I don’t like Junhui

 **JUST MINGYU** : same

 **1004** : Same

 **chan hyung** : same

 **seok** : same

 **moonjun** : fuck all y’all

 **god** : same

 **boo** : same

 **haohao** : I'm glad we're all on the same page

 **moonjun** : mingyu why don’t u introduce urself!!!!

 **JUST MINGYU** : hello. 

**god** : bro 

**JUST MINGYU** : i mingyu.

 **haohao** : So you're the Mingyu?

 **haohao** : Hi :)

 **JUST MINGYU** : hhhhdjhfjfnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

 **seok** : mingyu.exe has stopped working

 **god** : wait a moment folks

 **god** : this is a Gays Only chat

 **boo** : he’s right

 **moonjun** : oh shit

 **haohao** : A Gays Only chat?

 **moonjun** : yes we're all raging homos

 **haohao** : Huh

 **haohao** : Well

 **haohao** : I don't think I'm very raging

 **haohao** : Perhaps Im on the homo spectrum

 **haohao** :We're still figuring that part out

 **moonjun** : interesting

 **moonjun** : any thoughts mingyu?

 **JUST MINGYU** : jihoon u have a job to do here!

 **jihoon** : suddenly i forgot how to remove people !

 **jihoon** : how forgetful of me :(

 **JUST MINGYU** : :) end my life

 **1004** : Hi Minghao

 **1004** : I’m Jeonghan and you’re my son now

 **haohao** : Interesting?

 **wormwoo** : welcome

 **haohao** : Thank you :)

 **wormwoo** : im wonwoo

 **haohao** : What a fun name

 **chan hyung** : im chan confirmed youngest and cutest

 **god** : im soonyoung but you can call me tonight

 **god** : i will also answer to “appa”

 **jihoon** _removed_ **god** _from the chat_.

 **jihoon** : suddenly i remembered how to remove people

 **jihoon** : it’s a christmas miracle

 **chan hyung** : it's august

 **jihoon** : christmas came early it's another miracle

 **scoops** : I’m Seungcheol and I apologize on behalf of everyone here

 **haohao** : No it’s okay! This is fun

 **jo$hua** : Hehe

 **jo$hua** : I’m Joshua ! Nice to meet you !

 **haohao** : Nice to meet you!!

 **seok** : im seokmin

 **boo** : im seungkwan

 **moonjun** : im jun

 **boo** : bitch shut up

 **moonjun** : i was lacking attention

 **vernonie** : Sup I’m Vernon

 **boo** : that was very straight of you

 **vernonie** : And I like dick

 **boo** : better

 **jihoon** : im jihoon

 **jihoon** : and i think that’s everyone

 **haohao** : I’ll try my best to remember everyone!

 **seok** : aw i like him

 **JUST MINGYU** : SAME

 **JUST MINGYU** : i mean

 **JUST MINGYU** : beep beep boop

 **boo** : lollll

 **1004** : Would you like to join us for lunch tomorrow Minghao

 **haohao** : That’d be really nice!

 **scoops** : So much is happening

 **scoops** : It’s not even the end of the first week of school

 **seok** : life comes at ya fast sometimes

 **seok** : oh yeeah

 **seok** _added_ **god** _to the chat_.

 **god** : im really sick of this mistreatment lee jihoon

 **jihoon** : you say that as if i care about how you feel

 **god** : valid

 **god** : what did i miss

 **1004** : Minghao is joining us for lunch tomorrow

 **god** : oh good

 **vernonie** : I wanna eat lunch with Minghao :(

 **haohao** : You can’t?

 **seok** : not all of us have the same lunch

 **haohao** : Well that stinks

 **haohao** : We can always hang out outside of school

 **haohao** : I was actually invited to a party next Friday if you all want to join

 **haohao** : You can be my plus 12

 **boo** : PLUS 12

 **jihoon** : lol cute

 **god** : we’ll all be there

 **wormwoo** : now wait just a second

 **god** : no and fuck you

 **haohao** : It’s okay not everyone has to come

 **haohao** : Parties are scary sometimes

 **haohao** : But I’ll be there

 **chan hyung** : well we know at least one person is going then

 **haohao** : Good!

 **haohao** : I hope a lot of you can come!!!

 **haohao** : And I can’t wait for lunch tomorrow!

 **god** : minghao is perfect and i love him

 **moonjun** : he’s a scorpio

 **god** : well we all have flaws

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love scorpios please don't attack me


	6. very detrimental information

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tsundere: can both of you stop talking for like
> 
> tsundere: three days
> 
> tsundere: is that too much to ask

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry im popping these chapters out so fast im just EXCITED! FOR THE PARTY! AND you should be too

**get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge  
Friday, 11:12 a.m.**

**jihoon** : where is soonyoung’s good morning text

 **god** : you miss me don’t you

 **jihoon** : no i was looking forward to kicking you out of the chat today

 **seok** : how is mingyu doing

 **god** : yeah we haven’t heard from him since yesterday

 **haohao** : He looks fine to me

 **jihoon** : well he’s not talking which is a problem in and of itself

 **JUST MINGYU** : im trying to learn here

 **god** : ?

 **jihoon** : ???

 **1004** : He’s not okay call 911

 **wormwoo** : if you’re in pain blink twice

 **haohao** : He’s not looking at his phone

 **jihoon** : that’s an even bigger problem

 **1004** : Yikes

 **1004** : He’s pulling a Jihoon

 **jihoon** : wtf are u talking about

 **1004** : Ahahahahha

 **1004** : Nothing.

 

Mingyu’s spine pulled taut as he felt a hand on the bend of his elbow. He had just gotten up after the professor dismissed the class and was on his way out the door when Minghao’s slender fingers wrapped around his forearm. Mingyu forced himself to turn his head, immediately regretting it when wide brown eyes bore into his.

“You’re Mingyu, aren’t you?” 

Mingyu decided not to take too long lingering on the timbre of the boy’s voice, instead taking a step out the doorway. Minghao stayed attached to his arm. Mingyu’s heart rate tripled, and the skin on his arm burned. “Y-Yeah?”

Minghao giggled at that, a cute and precious sound, and his nose scrunched. “You seem unsure,” he observed, tapping his fingers against the bend of Mingyu’s elbow. “You’re eating lunch right now, right? You were there on Monday.”

“Yeah?”

Another giggle. He pulled gently at Mingyu’s arm, leading him in the direction of the cafeteria. “You don’t have to be so shy, Mingyu. I don’t bite.” Mingyu stumbled over his feet, earning his third laugh. He decided he could get used to the sound.

**get mingyu and jihoon boyfriends challenge  
11:51 a.m.**

**jihoon** : Attachment: 1 Image

 **god** : OMG

 **boo** : LOOK AT THEM

 **1004** : That was quick

 **1004** : Romance isn’t dead

 **scoops** : We’re literally dating

 **1004** : I didn’t ask for your opinion Dick & Air Conditioning 

**god** : STSIPP JEONGHAN

 **wormwoo** : even from the back mingyu looks like he’s ready to vomit

 **god** : i feel that i really do

 **jihoon** : they just met but it seems like they’re getting along well

 **god** _changed the group name to **get jihoon a boyfriend challenge**_.

 **jihoon** _changed the group name to **soonyoung shut up challenge**_.

 **chan hyung** _changed_ **jihoon** _’s name to_ **tsundere**.

 **tsundere** : out of everyone these past few days you’ve been testing my patience the most

 **god** : dammit i have to try harder

 **tsundere** : im never telling you anything ever again

 **chan hyung** : now that i know this very detrimental information

 **chan hyung** : it’s my job to force it out of you

 **tsundere** : that’s literally not how it works!

 **god** : why am i always left out of the good stuff

 **god** : ive known you the longest

 **god** : i deserve to know

 **chan hyung** : he really does deserve to know

 **tsundere** : can both of you stop talking for like

 **tsundere** : three days

 **tsundere** : is that too much to ask

 **chan hyung** : yes

 **god** : yes

 

“Guys,” Soonyoung trilled, slipping into the seat next to Jihoon and tugging at the shorter boy’s sweatshirt sleeve. “Jihoon looks really cute today, right? I think it’s cute when he wears oversized clothes. Because he’s small.”

“What did I just fucking say to you?” Jihoon hissed, face flushing bright red as he yanked his sleeve away from Soonyoung’s grip. “I told you to _stop talking_.” Soonyoung just grinned, propping his chin on the palm of his hand and watching as the shorter boy scooted his chair farther away from him.

“You’re just so easy to bother,” Soonyoung murmured, watching as Jihoon’s features twisted in displeasure. He yanked his chair so hard that Seungcheol almost tumbled off of his in the next seat over.

“You’re so infuriating,” Jihoon grumbled underneath the familiar chatter of the table. He angled himself so he was faced away from Soonyoung, shoveling rice into his mouth until his cheeks puffed up. Seungcheol, who was anchoring himself back onto the chair, met Soonyoung’s gaze with an exasperated eye roll.

The table was quiet for a few moments until Jeonghan spoke up: “So, what’s this party on Friday?”

Minghao glanced up from where he was in deep conversation with Mingyu, blinking slowly before smiling gently. “It’s at a friend of mine’s named Yanan. It starts at eight on Friday and he said I could bring as many people as I want.”

“I think we should all go,” Soonyoung piped up, twirling a plastic fork around in between his fingers. “Where is it?”

“Just down the block.” 

“Please don’t make me,” Jihoon grumbled.

“I second that,” Wonwoo followed. 

Soonyoung grimaced, giving Jihoon a look. “You’re going.” Jihoon grumbled incoherently in response and filled his mouth with ramen.

“I’m excited!” Joshua exclaimed, squirming a little in his seat. “I haven’t been to a college party before.” He turned to give Wonwoo a smile, who grinned back in response and mumbled a “can’t wait” before linking his fingers with Jisoo’s and resting their entwined hands on the table.

“Me neither,” Mingyu mumbled. He wrinkled his nose. “I don’t really like parties.”

Minghao’s shoulders slumped. “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”

“I love parties. Didn’t I just say that? Did I not just say I loved parties?”

“That’s not what I heard,” Seungcheol mumbled, earning a hard elbow to the side from Jeonghan.

Minghao’s face re-lit itself like a fire, and he clapped his hands together gently enough for the movement to not make a sound. “I’m excited!” he squeaked, eyes crinkling beneath his smile, and Mingyu felt like suffocating.


	7. subtlety

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> vernonie: If god was real he’d strike me where I stand
> 
> boo: you’re sitting baby
> 
> vernonie: If god was real
> 
> boo: he just stood up
> 
> vernonie: He’d strike me where I stand

**soonyoung shut up challenge  
Monday, 7:01 a.m.**

**god** : good morning kings

 **god** : today i was going to say something

 **god** : but the title of the chat has discouraged me

 **tsundere** : finally a life worth living

 **god** : is this what tsundere simulator is like

 **tsundere** _changed their name to_ **jihoon.**.

 **god** _changed_ **jihoon.** _’s name to_ **jihoon oppa**.

 **jihoon oppa** _changed_ **god** _’s name to_ **big dumb energy**.

 **big dumb energy** : why do you abuse me

 **big dumb energy** : i love you

 **jihoon oppa** : if you ever say that again i’ll end you

 **big dumb energy** : fine i’ll just love someone else

 **jihoon oppa** : …………..

 **1004** : Good morning my little chickens

 **big dumb energy** : little what

 **1004** : Bock bock

 **jo$hua** : Hello !

 **jo$hua** : It's the second week of school already

 **jo$hua** : And the party is soon :-)

 **seok** : im excited

 **boo** : no you aren’t

 **boo** : you’re a sleepy drunk

 **boo** : you’re literally just going to fall asleep

 **seok** : maybe im excited to sleep

 **wormwoo** : same

 **JUST MINGYU** : good morning comrades 

**big dumb energy** : the fuck did you just call me

 **scoops** : Hey kids

 **haohao** : I’m your son too??

 **haohao** : Why do I have four parents

 **boo** : good morning minghao

 **boo** : why is everyone up early

 **haohao** : I like to work out before everyone else wakes up

 **moonjun** : oh...a Man

 **haohao** : ;)

 **moonjun** : you and mingyu should work out together

 **moonjun** : seeing as you’ve already gotten pretty close

 **moonjun** : and mingyu could use the exercise

 **JUST MINGYU** : i really couldn't

 **haohao** : ? Mingyu doesn’t need to work out

 **JUST MINGYU** : exactly

 **haohao** : He’s really fit already

 **JUST MINGYU** : e.,,.xa ctlyu.. ... ..

 **moonjun** : fit already huh!

 **seok** : OMGGGGG

 **big dumb energy** : he actually eats like an absolute asshole but go off

 **JUST MINGYU** : ok fuck off

 **haohao** : Lol

 **moonjun** : Attachment: 1 Image

 **JUST MINGYU** : WHERE DID YOU GET THTA PICTURE

 **big dumb energy** : mingyu’s abs just turned me gay

 **big dumb energy** : i wasn’t gay before but now i am

 **chan hyung** : why do i have to look at this. why would you make me

 **haohao** : I knew he was fit~

 **wormwoo** : the shirt in the mouth bit is a bit unoriginal but i’ll give points for effort

 **seok** : why doesn’t anyone talk about how sexy mingyu is

 **boo** : his terrible personality overshadows his looks

 **wormwoo** : word to that brother

 **JUST MINGYU** : THE QUESTION REMAINS UNANSWERED 

**JUST MINGYU** : ALSO! SHUT UP !

 **moonjun** : i just had it sitting around

 **moonjun** : i have a few

 **moonjun** : want me to send the others !

 **jihoon oppa** : do any of you know about subtlety 

**jihoon oppa** : leave mingyu Alone

 **JUST MINGYU** : one (1) person is on my side

 **seok** : you don’t even know about subtlety jihoon

 **jihoon oppa** : what’s that supposed to mean

 **seok** : it’s not my place to say.

 **chan hyung** : did someone say subtlety

 **chan hyung** : i don’t think jihoon knows what that means

 **jihoon oppa** : don’t start with me today

 **vernonie** : Good morning

 **haohao** : Vern!!!!

 **vernonie** : What’s up man!!

 **seok** : the bro energy is so strong

 **big dumb energy** : hey seungkwan

 **boo** : what

 **big dumb energy** : get cho mans.

 **boo** : aight.

 **1004** : How did Minghao and Vernon become so close

 **vernonie** : We’re in the same composition class

 **haohao** : Vernon writes really good lyrics!

 **vernonie** : :’)

 **wormwoo** : pull up on you wacks?

 **big dumb energy** : with a mac fully loaded AH

 **vernonie** : Stop

 **boo** : headlines headlines

 **vernonie** : :(

 **JUST MINGYU** : Chillin chillin chillin eat Good

 **jo$hua** : Chilli chicken in the microwave

 **vernonie** : That one was good :(

 **boo** : hmmm...

 **jihoon oppa** : hmmmmmm...

 **vernonie** : If god was real he’d strike me where I stand

 **boo** : you’re sitting baby

 **vernonie** : If god was real

 **boo** : he just stood up

 **vernonie** : He’d strike me where I stand

 **big dumb energy** : let us know if god strikes him

 **boo** : i’ll keep you updated

 **vernonie** : This is why I don’t talk in here. I always get clowned

 **chan hyung** : don’t be dramatic

 **chan hyung** : you get clowned in person too

 **boo** : the garbage man is right

 **big dumb energy** : promote him 

**seok** : to garbage boss.

 **scoops** : What

 **1004** : I don’t even try to understand them anymore

 **big dumb energy** : it's ok not all of u can be as cute as us

 **chan hyung** : “cute” isn’t the word i would use

 **jihoon oppa** : annoying

 **chan hyung** : yes

 **wormwoo** : weird

 **chan hyung** : precisely 

**boo** : the three most uncute people in the chat

 **boo** : how ironic

 **seok** : wonwoo you read books for fun you don’t know anything

 **wormwoo** : remember when you used to call yourself dk

 **seok** : watch it gerard way

 **wormwoo** : what are you gonna do

 **wormwoo** : throw a barrel at me?

 **seok** : missing the old times when wonwoo was inactive in this chat

 **jo$hua** : Wonwooooooo

 **jo$hua** : Stop being mean

 **seok** : yes get cho mans joshua

 **jo$hua** : He Is my mans isn’t he

 **wormwoo** : he sure is

 **seok** : i don’t have a mans to stop me!

 **seok** : frick you wonwoo!!!!

 **big dumb energy** : i’ll be ur mans

 **chan hyung** : don't do it jihoon !

 **jihoon oppa** : don't do what

 **seok** : remove him :(

 **jihoon oppa** : why would i do that

 **wormwoo** : because you're you

 **jihoon oppa** : wonwoo has a brain so i will respect that

 **jihoon oppa** : the rest of you can eat my ass

 **big dumb energy** : deadass?

 **jihoon oppa** _removed_ **big dumb energy** _from the chat._

 **chan hyung** : what did i just say

 **jihoon oppa** : i don't take orders from children


	8. Houston We Have a Problem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> moonjun: u think i would fall for someone ugly?
> 
> moonjun: im not jihoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive posted like 2 or 3 chapters today? yolo i guess. also good luck reading this one

**soonyoung shut up challenge  
Thursday, 7:06 p.m.**

**moonjun** : folks

 **moonjun** : what should i wear for the party

 **scoops** : It’s in more than twenty four hours

 **moonjun** : ok and

 **moonjun** : beauty takes time

 **moonjun** : u think i look this good naturally?

 **jihoon oppa** : “good” is a very strong word

 **moonjun** : watch it twink

 **jihoon oppa** : yowch

 **wormwoo** : calling jihoon a twink is galaxy brain

 **wormwoo** : i knew junhui was useful for something

 **moonjun** : mcr is still broken up

 **wormwoo** : :(

 **1004** : The Sass, Junhui

 **moonjun** : SORRY

 **moonjun** : the party is at yanan’s house and i

 **moonjun** : have wanted his dick in my mouth since tenth grade

 **haohao** : OMG

 **moonjun** : so im nervous

 **big dumb energy** : omg…

 **big dumb energy** : is yanan The Guy ?

 **moonjun** : yes.

 **seok** : woooaaaaah

 **boo** : finally he has a name

 **moonjun** : he’s had a name i just didn’t tell you what it was

 **wormwoo** : yanan as in jock yanan?

 **wormwoo** : from high school?

 **moonjun** : and bingo was his name-o

 **scoops** : Thought Yanan was his name...o

 **1004** : We’re breaking up

 **big dumb energy** : tell the story

 **moonjun** : ugh

 **moonjun** : once upon a time i was minding my business

 **1004** : Unlikely. Continue

 **moonjun** : when this guy came up to me during passing period and was all like

 **moonjun** : “hey nasty” or...something… ..

 **moonjun** : it was a long time ago and im gay so my memory isn’t that great

 **moonjun** : but he started calling me a bunch of gay slurs and stuff and it looked like he was gonna punch me or smthn

 **moonjun** : and i was just out of the closet so i was kind of? Scared

 **moonjun** : and then yanan came up behind me

 **moonjun** : I’D NEVER MET HIM BEFORE

 **moonjun** : came up behind me and put his hand on my waist and was like

 **moonjun** : “leave my boyfriend alone before i scissor kick your skull in” to this guy

 **moonjun** : and the guy was all like

 **moonjun** : “skjjdkkjd. sorry yanan. jdkjsjk. u two are cute together” and left

 **moonjun** : and ever since that moment i’ve wanted to do an olympic award winning gymnastics split onto his dong

 **big dumb energy** : beautiful

 **haohao** : Brooooo.

 **haohao** : I had no idea

 **haohao** : I can hook you guys up

 **moonjun** : oh NO way

 **moonjun** : we haven’t spoken since then

 **moonjun** : i was like 15

 **haohao** : You can talk at the party and catch up

 **boo** : an incredible opportunity just fell into ur lap

 **boo** : u did not even deserve it

 **vernonie** : I don’t think Any of us deserve Minghao

 **haohao** : Hehe

 **moonjun** : he probably won’t even remember me

 **haohao** : Then you can just reintroduce yourselves !

 **moonjun** : hhhnnnnnnnnnng

 **moonjun** : do none of you remember who yanan is exactly

 **moonjun** : he’s like a yardstick taller than me

 **haohao** : Maybe half a yardstick

 **big dumb energy** : ive never heard of him in my life

 **jo$hua** : Wasn’t he captain of the basketball team ?

 **seok** : pretty sure he was quarterback or some shit

 **seok** : linebacker?

 **seok** : running man?

 **wormwoo** : he was the wide receiver but

 **wormwoo** : you tried your best and that’s all that matters

 **moonjun** : he was both!!!!!!!!!!!

 **moonjun** : and student council vice president for two years!!!!!!!

 **moonjun** : the man of my dreams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **haohao** : This is crazy

 **haohao** : His family is really close to mine so we’ve been friends for years

 **JUST MINGYU** : we were on the basketball team together

 **JUST MINGYU** : he’s so rich i thought about dating him

 **haohao** : His ancestors were royalty or something

 **moonjun** : i want to be rawed by him so bad

 **chan hyung** : ur like the size of a pringle

 **chan hyung** : he could probably bench press u

 **moonjun** : sounds sexy

 **big dumb energy** : if he’s not hot i’ll be really disappointed

 **JUST MINGYU** : he’s hot

 **haohao** : He’s hot

 **moonjun** : u think i would fall for someone ugly?

 **moonjun** : im not jihoon.

 **chan hyung** : FUCK

 **seok** : JUNHUI STSPOPP

 **big dumb energy** : jihoon likes someone?

 **1004** : HHFHJFJFJH

 **jihoon oppa** : why would you bring me into this

 **jihoon oppa** : what are you gaining

 **boo** : I CANTB REATHE

 **big dumb energy** : Who Does Jihoon Like

 **jihoon oppa** : can we keep talking about yanan? let’s talk about yanan.

 **seok** : why are you so concerned soonie

 **big dumb energy** : because jihoon’s my best friend ?

 **big dumb energy** : i think i have a right to know

 **seok** : uh oh

 **boo** : you didn’t

 **jihoon oppa** : lol

 **chan hyung** : jihoon

 **jihoon oppa** : What

 **1004** : Oh no

 **big dumb energy** : what the hell is going on

 **wormwoo** : isn’t the chat still called soonyoung shut up challenge

 **wormwoo** : u really should have taken that to heart homie

 **big dumb energy** : did you just call me your homie

 **big dumb energy** : what did i do

 **moonjun** : is it too late to start talking about yanan again

 **seok** : soonyoung honey

 **seok** : ur a bit slow on the uptake.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **big dumb energy** : ?????

 **big dumb energy** : WHATT DID I DO!!!!!!!!

 **JUST MINGYU** _changed the chat name to **Houston We Have a Problem**_.

 **haohao** : Huh

 **haohao** : I sense some hostility here

 **haohao** : Would anyone care for some Raisin Bran?

 **jo$hua** : I would like some please

**Houston We Have a Problem  
Friday, 8:12 a.m.**

**big dumb energy** : good m-morning *sniffles*

 **big dumb energy** : let’s s-secure this bag

 **wormwoo** : jihoon never came back

 **big dumb energy** : yeah im trying to repress that fact

 **big dumb energy** maybe repress his whole existence so i can pretend like this never happened

 **big dumb energy** : is anyone going to tell me what i did wrong now

 **chan hyung** : no

 **chan hyung** : let you and your two brain cells work it out

 **big dumb energy** : good morning to everyone except chan

 **seok** : didn’t you have time to sleep on it

 **seok** : maybe question your actions

 **big dumb energy** : assuming i slept

 **big dumb energy** : no

 **1004** : Did you text him?

 **big dumb energy** : yeah

 **big dumb energy** : he left me on read until my 34th message when he said

 **big dumb energy** : “Don’t worry about it. Just gotta sort out some stuff. Don’t take it personally and don’t just say things you think I want to hear. I’ll see you tonight.”

 **boo** : capital letters and all ?

 **big dumb energy** : yeah

 **boo** : uh oh

 **scoops** : He’ll come around

 **big dumb energy** : he’s never acted like this before

 **big dumb energy** : and i still don’t know what i did

 **chan hyung** : did you read the messages carefully

 **chan hyung** : the ones you sent before he left

 **big dumb energy** : yeah but i barely said anything

 **big dumb energy** : i don’t see anything that could have set him off

 **chan hyung** : sigh

 **big dumb energy** : whatever

 **big dumb energy** : i hate conflict

 **big dumb energy** : maybe i’ll see him at the party and it’ll be fine

 **haohao** : I’m sorry Soonyoung :(

 **big dumb energy** : no it’s okay

 **big dumb energy** : im just confused is all

 **big dumb energy** : sagittarians am i right!

 **scoops** : I know you’re upset but you can’t just make words up

**Houston We Have a Problem  
Friday, 12:13 p.m.**

**big dumb energy** : where

 **big dumb energy** : is he

 **boo** : he’s not at lunch ?

 **big dumb energy** : NO

 **big dumb energy** : I HATE THIS

 **seok** : :/

 **big dumb energy** : I **** ***

 **wormwoo** : don’t start

 **big dumb energy** : it’s how i feel.

 **jo$hua** : He did say “I’ll see you tonight”

 **jo$hua** : Not “I’ll see you at lunch”

 **scoops** : He’s right your honor

 **1004** : Omg

 **big dumb energy** : it’s fine ! im fine

 **chan hyung** : it’s okay to be sad

 **chan hyung** : he is your Best Friend after all

 **seok** : the bestest of friends…………………

 **big dumb energy** : being cryptic is not cute boys

 **moonjun** : i always inadvertently cause problems

 **moonjun** : remember when i added minghao to the chat when mingyu’s name was still “minghao’s bitch”

 **haohao** : ????

 **seok** : UFCKING ASS JUNHUI

 **moonjun** : OH

 **big dumb energy** : JUN

 **JUST MINGYU** : one day im gonna end my life

 **JUST MINGYU** : and you’re all gonna be like

 **JUST MINGYU** : “why did mingyu end his life”

 **JUST MINGYU** : just remember this moment so you don’t ask questions

 **boo** : JNUHUI YOU DUMBASS

 **moonjun** : who’s even surprised at this point

 **moonjun** : surely not me

 **JUST MINGYU** : yeah me neither

 **chan hyung** : looks like soonyoung and junhui are sharing the two brain cells

 **chan hyung** : and it’s not junhui’s turn

 **big dumb energy** : word to that!

 **haohao** : Mingyu won’t look at me

 **JUST MINGYU** : i sure won’t!

 **haohao** : -_______-

 **haohao** : It’s nothing to be embarrassed about

 **haohao** : The world is my bitch

 **big dumb energy** : there’s the scorpio i was waiting for

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and if you're reading this...well...good luck, soonyoung!


	9. whoomp there it is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> moonjun: to think it only took an argument for soonyoung to wrench his head loose from where it was stuffed in his ass

**Houston We Have a Problem  
Friday, 2:59 p.m.**

**big dumb energy** _added_ **jihoon oppa** _to the chat_.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **big dumb energy** _added_ **jihoon oppa** _to the chat_.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **big dumb energy** _added_ **jihoon oppa** _to the chat_.

 **scoops** : Soonyoung you’ve been at this for an hour now.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **big dumb energy** : im losing my fucking mind

 **big dumb energy** : i haven’t spoken to him since this morning

 **chan hyung** : that’s what happens when you

 **chan hyung** : nvm.

 **big dumb energy** : when i what, chan.

 **big dumb energy** : Say It

 **chan hyung** : No

 **1004** : I think you need to give him a bit of time

 **big dumb energy** : in this society we simply cannot afford time

 **boo** : well now you're just saying nonsense

 **big dumb energy** : you know nothing

 **wormwoo** : are we really going to have to walk you through this

 **big dumb energy** : yes

 **chan hyung** : fine

 **chan hyung** : who would like to go first

 **1004** : Ooh ooh pick me!

 **big dumb energy** _added_ **jihoon oppa** _to the chat_.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **scoops** : Soonyoung.

 **big dumb energy** : it was worth a shot

 **big dumb energy** : please continue

 **1004** : Yes. Thank you

 **1004** : Soonyoung I have a very special question for you

 **1004** : You will need both of your brain cells for this one

 **big dumb energy** : i resent the sass but i will comply

 **1004** : Good

 **1004** : Think real hard about this one

 **1004** : If you, in a hypothetical situation, had a crush on someone...

 **1004** : What is something they would do that would be discouraging to you

 **1004** : To make you go "ah, they must not like me"

 **big dumb energy** : what does this have to do with anything

 **1004** : Answer the question

 **big dumb energy** : ??? ok...

 **big dumb energy** : well for one if they liked someone else that'd be a dead giveaway

 **big dumb energy** : if they friend-zoned me i would assume that means they wouldn't like me

 **big dumb energy** : or if they shut me down when i flirt with them

 **1004** : I need you to stare at the word "friend-zoned"

 **1004** : And think long and hard about it

 **big dumb energy** : idk what ur trying to do here

 **big dumb energy** : if ur trying to make "friend-zoned" look like two fake words the longer i stare at them ur succeeding

 **chan hyung** : im going next!

 **chan hyung** : soonyoung do you like jihoon.

 **seok** : straight to the point

 **seok** : i support it

 **big dumb energy** : do i Like him?

 **big dumb energy** : as in like a crush?

 **chan hyung** : precisely

 **big dumb energy** : uhhhhhaha?

 **big dumb energy** : why would you ask that

 **chan hyung** : you suck at answering questions

 **big dumb energy** : and you suck at asking them

 **big dumb energy** : he's been my best friend since forever

 **big dumb energy** : i haven't really thought about it

 **big dumb energy** : okay that's a lie

 **chan hyung** : you have?

 **big dumb energy** : of course i have

 **big dumb energy** : i had a crush on him for a Really long time in high school

 **big dumb energy** : but he started being really cold and

 **big dumb energy** : you know how he is

 **big dumb energy** : he was being Himself so i figured he didn't like me back and i got over it

 **chan hyung** : your mind

 **chan hyung** : is tiny and underdeveloped

 **big dumb energy** : ouch

 **seok** : can i go next

 **chan hyung** : of course

 **seok** : soonyoung what does jihoon do whenever you flirt with me

 **seok** : or anyone

 **big dumb energy** : y'all are being weird...

 **big dumb energy** : he removes me

 **big dumb energy** : duh

 **seok** : and why do you think that is

 **big dumb energy** : bc im annoying

 **seok** : well

 **seok** : yeah.

 **seok** : but why else

 **seok** : maybe jealousy?

 **big dumb energy** : that doesn't make any sense

 **big dumb energy** : he knows i don't like you

 **seok** : he'd be upset if you liked me?

 **big dumb energy** : uhhhhh

 **big dumb energy** : this is all so much

 **big dumb energy** : thinking about jihoon this much is giving me angina

 **chan hyung** : and what exactly are you thinking about

 **big dumb energy** : well if you want Specifics

 **big dumb energy** : im thinking about how i miss him and his stupid antics

 **big dumb energy** : and about how cute it is when i compliment him and his face gets all red or when he pulls his sleeves over his hands when he’s cold or tired or both and sometimes covers his cheeks wit them.

 **big dumb energy** : he’s always wearing those huge sweaters and it doesn't make any sense because he's so small but it's cute

 **big dumb energy** : in high school i used to leave my sweatshirts at his apartment on purpose because i liked the way he looks in them

 **boo** : oh my god?

 **big dumb energy** : also when he tries not to smile at my dumb jokes his face strains so much that his dimples pop out and it’s

 **big dumb energy** : really cute of him.

 **big dumb energy** : and when he’s concentrating on something he pouts

 **big dumb energy** : his eyebrows get all scrunchy

 **vernonie** : Soonyoung

 **big dumb energy** : and now that im thinking Real HARD

 **big dumb energy** : like Really hard

 **big dumb energy** : im thinking

 **big dumb energy** : i wouldn't mind if we dated or whatever

 **big dumb energy** : like having him as my boyfriend would be cute

 **big dumb energy** : he's angry and pouty and stubborn and he sucks at handling feelings but i

 **big dumb energy** : i kinda wanna kiss him!!!!

 **big dumb energy** : guys i think i have a crush on jihoon still.

 **seok** : whoomp there it is

 **boo** : are u done?

 **big dumb energy** : oh

 **big dumb energy** : OH?

 **big dumb energy** : I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?

 **big dumb energy** _changed their name to_ **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?**

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** _changed the chat name to_ **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?**

 **seok** : i really thought he was ok

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?

 **moonjun** : to think it only took an argument for soonyoung to wrench his head loose from where it was stuffed in his ass

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : WHAT DO I DO?

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : GUYS WHAT DO I DO

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : JIHOON IS MAD AT ME AND I HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : HE’S NEVER GOIGN TO LIKE ME NOW

 **seok** : yeah he’s still stupid

 **boo** : who’s gonna tell him

 **chan hyung** : soonyoung

 **chan hyung** : jihoon got upset because you called him your best friend

 **chan hyung** : he has a crush on you and you friendzoned him.

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : he what

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : I WHAT

 **JUST MINGYU** : hello friends i am here

 **JUST MINGYU** : uhhh goodbye friends i am gone?

 **chan hyung** : remember that time when jihoon got smashed in like 9th grade when he visited korea for the summer and streaked down hangang and sent videos to everyone

 **chan hyung** : i called him to make sure he was ok and he accidentally told me under Heavy Intoxication that he was in love with you

 **wormwoo** : whoomp there it is

 **seok** : he told me he wanted to punch yugyeom in the face after you went to the homecoming dance with him in eleventh grade because “it should be me with my soonyoung not that yam with arms”

 **scoops** : I once asked if he liked you and he said “yes and fuck off”

 **wormwoo** : i have eyes and a brain so i just knew

 **moonjun** : same

 **moonjun** : i may be stupid but im not an idiot

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i have a crush onnjihoon

 **chan hyung** : and jihoon has a crush on you!

 **chan hyung** : surprise

 **haohao** : Even I could tell

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : what am i supposed to do if he's IGNORING ME,

 **seok** : talk to him at the party?

 **seok** : he can’t avoid u if ur there in person

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : Maybe You’re Right

 **boo** : you got this

 **boo** : u are nothing if not annoying and persistent and stubborn

 **chan hyung** : and stupid

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : if i wasn’t so happy and a little unconscious right now i’d end you

 **JUST MINGYU** : i love romance

 **1004** : You better

 **1004** : You’re next

 **JUST MINGYU** : there’s like three other single people in this chat

 **JUST MINGYU** : please let me live

 **haohao** : Yeah leave my bitch alone!

 **moonjun** : LMAOOOO

 **JUST MINGYU** : SHUT UP

 **chan hyung** : HAOOOO

 **vernonie** : YEAAAAH BRO

 **JUST MINGYU** : wish jihoon was here to remove me

 **wormwoo** : do not fear

 **wormwoo** _removed_ **JUST MINGYU** _from the chat_.

 **wormwoo** : i didn't know how much joy a press of a button would bring me

 **wormwoo** : my life can only go down from here


	10. brain-to-mouth filter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “...you’re kind of super obvious. The way you look at him says you want to, like, choke him or something. And not in the death way.”

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Friday, 7:54 p.m.**

**haohao** : You guys almost here?

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : seok and i are right outside

 **haohao** : Great!

 **haohao** : Gyuuuu?

 **JUST MINGYU** : what Dammit

 **haohao** : You’re still coming?

 **JUST MINGYU** : yes-_-

 **haohao** : :D

 **jo$hua** : Wonwoo and I are on our way !

 **scoops** : Jeonghan will definitely take an hour to get ready

 **scoops** : But we’ll be there sometime before midnight

 **haohao** : Take your time !!!!

 

Minghao tucked his phone into his back pocket as the doorbell rang. He glanced at Yanan, who was meticulously setting up a drink station, with a light “I got it” before shuffling to the front door. Seokmin and Soonyoung were standing in the doorway together, the latter immediately going up on the tips of his toes to scan the area behind Minghao’s head. 

“Please tell me Jihoon’s here,” Seokmin begged before Minghao or Soonyoung could speak. Minghao just shook his head, stepping to the side. 

“You two are the first,” he informed them, leaning against the doorway. Seokmin, surprisingly, seemed absolutely devastated by the news, mumbling a soft 'god damn it.' The two boys shouldered each other on the way inside. Soonyoung huffed, sporting an irritated sort of pout.

Minghao peeked out the doorway as Soonyoung began complaining behind him and Seokmin told him "Don't start, don't fucking start," grinning as he noticed Mingyu’s slouched form coming up the sidewalk. He was wearing a pressed red blazer with a black t-shirt underneath and red plaid dress pants. He looked _extremely_ good, and Minghao knew he did. Felt it in his stomach, even; it was a slight churning feeling, only a little painful, as he took in the entirety of Mingyu’s appearance. Still-

“You didn’t have to dress so nice,” he teased as Mingyu got closer, crossing his arms over his chest. Mingyu crossed his own arms back at him, averting his eyes as a light pink blush fanned across his cheeks.

“I don’t care,” Mingyu grumbled as he stepped into the house, glancing at Minghao for a split second and looking away quickly with a scrunch of his nose. “You’re not the boss of me.”

Minghao gave the taller boy a faux sad pout, shutting the door behind them. “Oh?” He leaned back against the wall, taking the opportunity to unabashedly rake his eyes down Mingyu’s backside. Even from under the blazer the muscles of his back shown through the fabric. His thighs were defined under his pants, too, which, _yeah, that’s doing something to me_. “Thought you were my bitch?”

“I’m not talking to you.”

Minghao giggled as Mingyu walked brusquely away from him, straight to the drink station. Minghao watched as Yanan took notice of Mingyu strolling towards him and immediately lit up, mouth going into an “o” of recognition.

“Kim Mingyu!” Yanan essentially squealed, pulling said boy into a full-on hug. Minghao took it upon himself to lean against the counter, watching as they spoke animatedly to each other. After a minute or so, Mingyu, now holding a red solo cup full of _something_ , asked where the restroom was. As soon as Yanan pointed upstairs, Mingyu dipped his head and set the cup down in front of Minghao’s hands without looking at him and skipped towards the staircase with a fervor. 

Minghao watched him go, lips twitching into a smile, until Yanan’s crisp Mandarin brought him back: “Is that the guy you’ve been texting all week?” Minghao looked up at Yanan, the latter sporting a knowing glint in his eye.

“How did you know?” the former asked, reaching for Mingyu’s cup. He tilted it back and forth, watching as the fluorescent blue liquid swirled around inside. 

“No offense, Hao,” Yanan chuckled, leaning against the fridge and crossing his arms, “but you’re kind of super obvious. The way you look at him says you want to, like, choke him or something. And not in the death way.”

Minghao clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and nodded a little, bringing the cup up to his lips. “Maybe so.” For Mingyu being the first boy he really liked, he wasn’t too nervous. If anything, Mingyu was the nervous one between them.

An arm dropped itself around Minghao’s shoulders. Unsurprisingly, he came face to face with Junhui, who was grinning too brightly for the close proximity. “Hey, ugly,” he breathed, before looking up and seeming to notice Yanan for the first time. The color promptly dropped from his face, and his arm unceremoniously slid off of Minghao’s shoulders.

“Oh,” Minghao singsonged, Junhui’s previous grin transferring to his own face, “Yanan, you’ve met Junhui, haven’t you?”

Yanan glanced away from where he was cracking open a can of beer, opened his mouth, looked away, closed his mouth, looked back at Junhui, and widened his eyes a little. “Wen Junhui?” he asked almost hesitantly, squinting his eyes as if his vision was blurry and that would help him see clearer. “From high school?”

“Hi.” Junhui’s voice came out small, and the color rushed back into his face, albeit a bit red. “It’s been a long time.”

Yanan nodded absently, staring at Junhui as if the boy had an arm growing out of his head. “Yeah,” he mumbled, “it’s been a while.” After a moment he seemed to come back to life, head flitting comically between facing Junhui and the various bottles of alcohol (and Sprite; “I’m an inclusive man”). “Do you- would you like a drink?”

Junhui slid into the bar stool next to Minghao, smiling shyly. “Yeah, sure. Nothing too strong, though. I’m a lightweight.” He then turned his attention to Minghao. “Where’s your boyfriend?”

Minghao tightened his lips into a fine line, noting the way the boy’s demeanor completely changed back into his normal, obnoxious self. “Bathroom,” he responded curtly, not liking the way Junhui’s lips pulled up into a smirk.

“Glad you know who I’m talking about,” Jun quipped, nudging his shoulder against Minghao’s. “Have you asked him out like you said you would?”

Minghao wrinkled his nose. Yeah, Mingyu and him had been talking since they formally met, and had gotten rather close after the past week. He knew Mingyu liked him (the boy looked like he was going to pass out when they made eye contact on the first day of school and he’s no Soonyoung), but Mingyu still, for some reason, made him feel jittery and nervous when it came to thoughts of intimacy. It was easier to tease him. “None of your business,” he mumbled, pursing his lips at Junhui’s knowing eye roll.

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Friday, 8:11 p.m.**

**vernonie** : Seungkwan and I just got here

 **vernonie** : Jihoon has been spotted on the lawn

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : ambush him

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : make sure he can’t escape

 **vernonie** : Soonyoung that sounds illegal

 **boo** : he looks like he’s ready to turn tail and bust the fuck out this joint

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : does he look cute

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : genuine question

 **chan hyung** : you’re being quite bold for someone who just figured out you had a crush on him six hours ago

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i didn't "figure it out" you primordial insect

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i simply removed my layers and layers of emotional repression and found it underneath

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : just gemini things!

 **boo** : weird flex but ok...

 

By now, the house was moderately packed. Soonyoung, who was standing by the staircase with his leg bouncing sporadically, was squinting through the haze that had started to fill the living room to try and see the door. The lights had dimmed and the music had gotten loud, and Soonyoung was trying his very best to navigate his sight through the throng of people and locate Jihoon whenever he walked in. “He’s so fucking short,” he lamented, “I don’t think I’ll be able to find him.”

Seokmin sighed heavily next to him, sound echoing around in his plastic cup as he held it to his lips. “Pretty sure your ‘Jihoon Tunnel Vision’ will prove effective.”

Soonyoung just grumbled incoherently under his breath, eyes still glued on the front door, before letting out a small “frick you.” He glanced at Seokmin’s cup as the other boy sipped it generously, nose twitching as the smell of pure alcohol hit his nose. “Think I’ll be able to do this sober?”

“Definitely not.”

Soonyoung nodded, crossing his arms. “My thoughts exactly.” He smiled a little when Seokmin held the cup towards him without a word and he grabbed it gratefully, tilting his head back and downing it in one sip. It burned on its way down, and he voiced that as a hiss from the back of his throat. “What is this?”

“Not sure,” Seokmin replied, snatching his cup back. “I just said ‘give me something strong’ and the Junhui Dream Boat handed this to me.” He punctuated his sentence with a yawn, and Soonyoung rolled his eyes, nudging his friend in the direction of the bar.

“It’s been, like, ten minutes,” Soonyoung said in an accusing tone, “and you had three-fourths of a drink. If you’re tired already, I’ll beat you senseless.”

There was a gap in Soonyoung’s memory starting when he ushered Seokmin to the bar and ending with him holding a pool cue loosely in his hands, squinting at the arrangement of colored balls in front of him. He tried extra hard to focus, but his concentration was severely impaired by the alcohol he (most likely; he couldn’t exactly remember) consumed. The cue was starting to feel heavy in his hand, so, naturally, he dropped it onto the pool table.

“ _Soonyoung_ ,” Seokmin whined from across the table, voice kicked up half an octave like it normally did when he was drunk, “that’s not how you play.”

“The stick was heavy,” he muttered back, the words weighing his tongue down. He reached blindly for the cup next to him, taking a long sip. He set the cup back down slowly as to not knock it over, watching as Seokmin reached for the pool cue and nearly dropped it himself.

“Hey,” Seokmin mumbled, leaning down and pointing the cue at the white ball with surprising precision. 

“What,” Soonyoung slurred, stepping to the side to get a better angle of Seokmin's pool stance, “s’there something on my face?”

Seokmin shook his head, closing one eye and keeping the other trained on the ball. “No. Jihoon’s standing right behind you.” He let the cue go. The ball did a little hop and rocketed itself off of the table and onto the floor with an uncomfortable cracking sound. “Aw, dicks.”

It took a second for Soonyoung to process his best friend’s words. When he finally did, he spun around so quickly that his brain took about five seconds to catch up. Jihoon _was_ standing behind him, but his back was facing him. He was talking to some guy who was significantly taller than Soonyoung, and the guy was laughing, and _Jihoon_ was laughing.

“Who’s that guy?” Soonyoung grumbled, already taking steps towards Jihoon. Seokmin responded, but the sound faded into the background.

Another gap in his memory took place. Eventually, Soonyoung found himself with his entire body weight on Jihoon, leaning against him as they walked down some street in the middle of the night. Jihoon was definitely speaking, but his words sounded garbled, like they were underwater.

“-have to babysit you like this every time you get drunk,” the shorter boy was saying, voice shaking, “because you can’t handle your goddamn liquor. How you can be so stupid under the influence is beyond me. And are you even _listening_ to me right now?”

Soonyoung looked up at Jihoon, at the way the moon lit up his skin and made him look soft and pleasant, even when he was shooting Soonyoung a glare made of flames. Soonyoung seriously wanted to kiss him.

“I know.” Jihoon suddenly looked bashful, angling his face away. He was probably blushing. It was hard to see. “You’ve said so about a hundred times in the past ten minutes. I’m gonna have to ask you to shut up.”

“But it’s true,” Soonyoung mumbled. He didn’t even remember saying it out loud, but he’s glad he did; Jihoon always looked cutest when he was shy.

Jihoon’s grip tightened on his arm and he let out a sort of scoff. Apparently, Soonyoung had voiced that, too. “Your brain-to-mouth filter still isn’t working, I see.”

Soonyoung smiled lightly before shoving Jihoon to the side so their arms disconnected, trying his best to stand up straight despite the wobbling the concrete underneath him did. “I can walk by myself, y’know,” he stated, leaning back against Jihoon anyways. “I missed you. Also, what happened?”

“I can barely understand you,” Jihoon grumbled, but the smile was audible in his voice. “You tried to fight Wonwoo because you thought he was trying to flirt with me. Then you passed out on me.” A pause. “I can’t ever leave you alone, can I?”

Soonyoung shook his head, groaning under his breath as the movement caused his brain to slosh around. “And you shouldn’t,” was all he could manage. And even though he was sobering up, he kept his weight half-balanced against Jihoon, hoping the other boy wouldn’t make them part.

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Friday, 11:46 p.m.**

**chan hyung** : i just accidentally walked in on junhui going down on some guy

 **chan hyung** : i was looking for the bathroom dude

 **haohao** : Yep

 **JUST MINGYU** : that would be yanan

 **chan hyung** : that’s great

 **chan hyung** : how dangerous is it to wash your eyes out with liquid soap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive never been drunk before so .. if there are any inaccuracies .. my bad


	11. sober thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> scoops: Did Jisoo just say the f word
> 
> jo$hua: I’m an adult

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Friday, 11:59 p.m.**

**scoops** : We’re here -_-

 **1004** : Stop complaining or you’re walking home

 **scoops** : I’m the one who drove

 **wormwoo** : you missed drunk soonyoung threatening to beat me up

 **scoops** : What,

 **wormwoo** : he was so drunk he didn’t recognize me and tried to fight me because he thought i was flirting with jihoon

 **boo** : LMAO

 **seok** : i can vouch for this i saw it with my eyes

 **seok** : also anyone know where i can take a nap

 **chan hyung** : not in the master bedroom

 **seok** : thanks

 **boo** : you are not about to sleep at this party

 **jo$hua** : He always sleeps at parties

 **seok** : he’s right

 **1004** : Has anyone seen the Ming couple

 **boo** : THE MING COUPLE

 **wormwoo** : they’re probably fucking

 **haohao** : Definitely not

 **haohao** : Mingyu is too drunk to give consent

 **haohao** : He’s been trying but i don’t think he’ll remember in the morning

 **haohao** : He also keeps switching languages and I have no clue what he’s saying

 **1004** : LOL

 **seok** : that’s very drunk mingyu

 **boo** : where even are u two

 **haohao** : I’m in the bathroom upstairs making sure he doesn’t get vomit on his clothes

 **wormwoo** : that’s actually

 **wormwoo** : really cute

 **scoops** : And a little disgusting

 **1004** : Why don’t you ever do that for me

 **scoops** : Would you do it for me

 **1004** : Hell no

 **scoops** : Well

 **chan hyung** : romance is alive and well

 **chan hyung** : i still haven’t even had my first kiss

 **JUST MINGYU** : channie 애기 is inncoent

 **wormwoo** : tell him to keep vomiting please

 **JUST MINGYU** : 조용히해ㅐㅐ worm

 **wormwoo** : that one cut deep

 **boo** : if y’all had just seen what i just saw ..

 **seok** : tell no one

 **chan hyung** : i have just had my first kiss

 **vernonie** : LOL

 **haohao** : WTF

 **seok** : i asked respectfully if he wanted his first kiss

 **seok** : and he said “hit me with it brother”

 **chan hyung** : maybe i now have feelings for seokmin

 **boo** : he’s definitely aro so good luck with that

 **chan hyung** : feelings gone

 **vernonie** : Where are Jihoon and Soonyoung?

 **jo$hua** : Probably fucking

 **seok** : jihoon’s a pussy bitch he would never

 **scoops** : Did Jisoo just say the f word

 **jo$hua** : I’m an adult

 **haohao** : Jihoon and Soonyoung left together

 **boo** : we’ll probably hear it from soonie in the morning

 **boo** : UGH he’s so irritating when he’s hungover

 **1004** : Jihoon will take care of him like he always does

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** _added_ **jihoon oppa** _to the chat_.

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i am nnot that drunk

 **jihoon oppa** : he’s a liar and he’s lying

 **jihoon oppa** : what the hell is the name of this chat

 **jihoon oppa** : what the hell is soonie’s screen name

 **jihoon oppa** : what the hell is going on

 **1004** : We were just talking about you!

 **seok** : it was all soonyoung baby !

 **jihoon oppa** : instead of calling me baby you should go take a nap or something

 **seok** : ugh i wish

 **jihoon oppa** : i told soonyoung to add me so i could tell you guys he’s okay

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i cam tell them myself

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i want to kiss jihoon on the mouth

 **jihoon oppa** : literally shut up

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : if youre kissing me i wouldn’t be ablw to talk

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : get to it!!!!

 **jihoon oppa** _removed_ **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** _from the chat_.

 **jihoon oppa** : anyways

 **jihoon oppa** : he’s still not sober enough to handle motor functions by himself so he’s staying at my place for the night

 **jihoon oppa** : just in case you guys were worried

 **wormwoo** : if he got hit by a car i wouldn’t bat an eye

 **seok** : could not care less for his wellbeing

 **jihoon oppa** : he said “fuck wonwoo lives fuck seokmin lives bitch” and fell asleep

 **seok** : i love him

 **1004** : You don’t seem to flustered that he’s flirting with you

 **jihoon oppa** : he’s been flirting all night

 **jihoon oppa** : but he’s stupid when he’s drunk so he’s probably just saying whatever nonsense comes into his head

 **chan hyung** : nah man

 **chan hyung** : drunk mouths say sober thoughts

 **scoops** : Who taught you that

 **scoops** : You’re like 12

 **chan hyung** : your mom

 **JUST MINGYU** : omggggg 상남자ㅏh

 **jihoon oppa** : who let mingyu get this drunk

 **JUST MINGYU** : your mom…..

 **JUST MINGYU** : good one

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Saturday, 12:39 a.m.**

**moonjun** : HEY

 **moonjun** : WHAT’S UP !

 **chan hyung** : don’t “what’s up” me you fiend

 **moonjun** : oh was that you who walked in

 **chan hyung** : YOU NOTICED ME AND YOU DIDB’T STOP???

 **moonjun** : i was living my dreams

 **moonjun** : i wouldn’t stop if the house caught on fire

 **1004** : A man with ambition

 **moonjun** : anyone got any tylenol

 **haohao** : Just ask Yanan for some

 **moonjun** : i can’t do that

 **moonjun** : i already told him it didn’t hurt.

 **vernonie** : Noooooooooo

 **boo** _has left the chat_.

 **chan hyung** _has left the chat_.

 **jihoon oppa** _has left the chat_.

 **scoops** _has left the chat_.

 **JUST MINGYU** _has left the chat_.

 **wormwoo** _has left the chat_.

 **moonjun** : and i don’t regret it your honor

 **seok** _has left the chat_.


	12. surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just soonyoung: i don’t want to know what i did last night
> 
> just soonyoung: you’re speaking to me again so it must’ve been fucked up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got an ask on tumblr that said "hey what happened to ur fic on ao3 did u drop it" and i didn't answer because i was so ashamed.

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Saturday, 10:33 a.m.**

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : good morning kings

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : end my life

 **seok** : same

 **vernonie** : Morning sunshines

 **vernonie** _changed the group name to **hangover club**_.

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : my head hurts like a bitch

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : idk who’s house im in

 **jihoon oppa** : you’re in my house dumbass

 **jihoon oppa** : im in the kitchen

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : how did i end up here

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : how did u end up back in this chat

 **jihoon oppa** : use your legs to come to the kitchen and your mouth to ask again

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : i don’t like your sass

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : however

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : that was kind of sexy

 **jihoon oppa** : don’t start

 **jihoon oppa** : we have a lot to talk about

 **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** : damn i got into some shit last night huh!

 **seok** : you could say that

 **boo** : i didn’t even drink that much and i feel like ive been hit in the neocortex with a baseball bat

 **JUST MINGYU** : help me i feel like im dyig n

 **scoops** : This is what happens when you drink kids

 **1004** : What kind of alcohol was served

 **1004** : My brain feels bruised

 **JUST MINGYU** : i don’t remember anything

 **haohao** : Maybe it’s for the best

 **JUST MINGYU** : no recollection

 **JUST MINGYU** : how did i end up in my house

 **JUST MINGYU** : WHY IS MINGHAO IN MY HOUSW

 **haohao** : Surprise

 **1004** _changed_ **JUST MINGYU** _’s name to_ **just mingyu**.

 **1004** _changed_ **I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?** _’s name to_ **just soonyoung**.

 **1004** : The caps lock was hurting my head

 **just soonyoung** : im never “just soonyoung”

 **wormwoo** : but you’re always “just annoying”

 **moonjun** : “just insufferable”

 **chan hyung** : “just stupid”

 **just soonyoung** : fuck all y’all

 **jihoon oppa** : why aren’t you out of bed yet

 **just soonyoung** : im trying to avoid the inevitable 

**just soonyoung** : i don’t want to know what i did last night

 **just soonyoung** : you’re speaking to me again so it must’ve been fucked up

 **jihoon oppa** : just come to the kitchen before you get your shit rocked

 **just soonyoung** : in the bad way or the sexy way

 **jihoon oppa** : can you get your dumb ass out of bed

 **just soonyoung** : i have a crush on you

 **jihoon oppa** : i’ve been made aware.

 **moonjun** : u seem real adamant to get him out of bed, but,

 **moonjun** : he probably smells like ass,

 **haohao** : Like you’re one to talk

 **haohao** : Did you even shower after last night

 **moonjun** : well

 **moonjun** : no

 **moonjun** : i can’t really walk

 **moonjun** : so

 **jo$hua** : Please God No

 **boo** : My Virgin Ears

 **moonjun** : i typed it i didn’t say it out loud

 **boo** : My Virgin Eyes

 **haohao** : Did you stay over at Yanan’s

 **moonjun** : yup!

 **moonjun** : he’s downstairs making breakfast

 **moonjun** : when my legs start working again im gonna help him clean up th party mess

 **chan hyung** : wow

 **chan hyung** : junhui out here living his dreams and i had my first kiss with seokmin

 **seok** : why are you acting like that isn’t a reward

Soonyoung rubbed his eye with a fist and leaned against the kitchen island, letting out a loud yawn. “Good morning, sweet baby,” he mumbled, climbing onto the countertop. He squinted against the glare of the kitchen lights and looked down at Jihoon, who was already giving him a stone hard look from where he was preparing what looked like pancakes. Soonyoung rested his chin on his palm and smiled a little, eyes squinting. “Have I mentioned how cute you are?”

At Soonyoung’s words, Jihoon turned right back around to the stove. Soonyoung didn’t have to see his face to know he was blushing. “We need to talk,” he grumbled, fingers fiddling with the pan’s handle, “about last night. Also, what took you so long?”

“I was scared and I also had to vomit a little,” he exhaled truthfully, letting his legs fall over the edge of the counter and swing back and forth. “We didn’t fuck last night, did we?”

“ _No,_ ” Jihoon answered quickly, bringing a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, “no, just- can you stop? For, like, three minutes.” When Jihoon glanced at him, face bright red starting at the tips of his ears and covering the surface area of his cheeks, Soonyoung made a motion of zipping his lips shut and locking it with an invisible key. Jihoon sighed heavily before turning back to his pancake cooking, reaching for a spatula. “So,” he began, softer and more timid than Soonyoung has ever heard him as he pressed the spatula against the top of one of the pancakes, “last night you got...drunk. Hammered. Plastered.”

Soonyoung hummed in agreement, and his head throbbed at the temple as if to further confirm the news.

“And I was, naturally, trying to avoid you all night, until Wonwoo came up to ask me about what was going on. That’s when you lumbered up, all ‘leave my crush alone, Man-I’ve-never-seen-in-my-life’ to Wonwoo. Like, _that’s_ how drunk you were.” Soonyoung couldn’t help but snort softly, because he _would_ do that. “And while you were gearing up to, I don’t know, take a full swing at one of your best friends of five years, you started whining and telling me that you didn’t feel well. You vomited a little in the kitchen on the way to the trash can, and then demanded that I take you home.”

“I _demanded_?” Soonyoung squeaked disbelievingly.

“Shut up. Anyways, I had to half-carry you home as you stumbled around and waxed poetic about my eyes and my mouth and shit, and-”

“Wait,” Soonyoung wailed, ignoring the glare Jihoon shot him, “I thought we were supposed to talk as in mutually discuss things, not recount yesterday’s episode of Soonyoung Is An Idiot When He’s Drunk.”

“I’m getting there,” Jihoon mumbled, flipping a pancake over. The surface was a crisp golden brown, and the smell had started to fill the apartment. He pressed the spatula against the pancake again and paused as it sizzled underneath the touch. “God, you can’t last half a minute without speaking. _Anyways_ , I don’t know why this all started happening so suddenly. One day, you’re calling me your ‘best friend,’ and the next you’re telling me you’ve been thinking about kissing me for three years. So, I just need to clear things up, I guess, since you’ve never shown an interest in me before. Like, you just came up here, like, ‘morning, sweet baby,’ and I don’t mean to _freak out_ or anything, but I’m definitely on the freaking-out spectrum. I mean, it’s not that I don’t like you, because I very obviously do, but I just- It’s just a lot-”

“Jihoon-”

“-and I don’t want to ruin anything if, like, I’m reading too far into it, and you’re just being nice-”

“Jihoonie-”

“Shut up, I’m trying t-”

“Jihoon, you’re burning the pancakes.”

Jihoon stopped rambling and looked down at where his spatula was still pressed into the pancake. He let out a squeak of dismay and immediately swung his hands around to scrape the pastry off of the pan with the utensil, nose wrinkling at the burnt smell. Soonyoung hopped off of the counter and reached behind Jihoon’s head to turn the stove off, the latter still struggling with the pancake and letting out a string of apologies to both Soonyoung and the bread. Soonyoung, with a heavy sigh, shuffled in front of the shorter boy and took the pan and spatula from his grip gently. Jihoon gave a frenzied look as Soonyoung carefully wedged the spatula underneath the burnt pancake and began to nudge it upwards from where it was stuck.

“You’re really freaking out over nothing, Jihoon,” Soonyoung mumbled amusedly, effectively removing one of the pancakes and balancing it on top of the spatula. “You want this?”

“No, God, no,” Jihoon exhaled, sounding out of breath. “Just- toss it.”

Soonyoung did what he was told, slipping past the shorter man to throw the burnt dough away into the trash can. “Anyways, it might have taken me awhile to realize how I felt, but everything I said last night was true. I wasn’t just saying things just because I thought you’d like it. And, honestly, do you think I’d be capable of that? I literally didn’t know who Wonwoo was.” He started to work on the other pancake, which was significantly easier to lift. “I’m eating this one.” He plopped it onto the plate Jihoon had set next to him before turning back towards the latter, holding the spatula out for him to take. Jihoon just stood there, dumbfounded. “What?” Soonyoung teased. “Is it that hard to believe?” When Jihoon didn’t respond, he tilted his head and gave him a goofy grin. “I thought _I_ was the dumb one.”

Jihoon let out something that sounded like a whine, taking the handle of the spatula and hitting Soonyoung on the chest with it. “Leave me alone,” he mumbled, bringing the spatula back and holding it to his own heart. “I just...didn’t think I’d fall for someone so stupid. And that someone of such small brain capacity could fall for me right back.”

“But you did. And I did.” Soonyoung shovelled a bit of pancake into his mouth and smiled over the mouthful, reaching out to poke the tip of Jihoon’s nose. Jihoon scowled, cheeks flushing. “Don’t make that face,” he protested, hopping back onto the counter. “It makes me wanna kiss you.”

“Shut _up_ ,” Jihoon whined, covering his face with both hands and leaning against the counter opposite of where Soonyoung was. “How did I get stuck with you? Seriously. I fucking hate you.”

“At least let me brush my teeth before you make cute faces like that. Now you’re gonna have to be patient.”

“You can’t just _say_ things like that, Soonyoung!”

“But you like the idea, right? Of me kissing you? Because I really want to.”

“God, will you shut your mouth?”

**I HAVE A CRUSH ON JIHOON?  
Saturday, 10:47 a.m.**

**chan hyung** : i know ur aro but i can still suck ur dick right

 **1004** : Oh my fucking god

 **seok** : please say sike.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yea y'all really waited a month for this shit. and i don't regret it your honor

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: buseoksun  
> twitter: leunseos


End file.
